


Stepping Into Sunlight

by Nyxierose



Series: Octavia Ascendant [1]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Domestic Fluff, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-06
Updated: 2014-06-06
Packaged: 2018-02-03 15:59:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1750358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nyxierose/pseuds/Nyxierose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the aftermath, Octavia picks herself up and chooses to let her heart guide her. Fluffy AU after the events of 1x12.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stepping Into Sunlight

In the aftermath, Octavia is alone. Around her, what remains of her people - she will call them that shamelessly now, each and every one of the sixty-odd teenagers she fought alongside today - are regrouping, counting the dead and healing the wounded. People move from place to place, none of them seeing her, and maybe it's just as well. She was brave today, but she wishes she didn't have to be that girl.

The knife strapped to her back once more has drawn blood since it came into her possession. She didn't kill, or at least she doesn't think she did, but she attacked and she would've done more if an object falling from the sky hadn't ended the battle before it went too far. Still far enough for a decent number of casualties on both sides, but the leaders are discussing peace now in the face of whatever the hell that was, no one seems to know but there's going to be a combined search party later this afternoon and…

"Octavia?" A voice snaps her out of her distractions - Lin, she's pretty sure the kid's name is, one of the younger girls who has a keen eye for plants. "Someone's looking for you."

"If it's my brother, tell him to screw off," Octavia mutters.

"It's not. It's… one of _them_."

Her heart stops for a moment, then compensates, pulse racing. She knows damn well what this means, _who_ this means - far as she knows, none of the other Grounders know she exists, let alone enough to ask for her by name. It's entirely plausible someone slipped that information, but she's still insignificant, useless in the grand scheme of things. Thus, there's only one explanation to cling to. "Where is he?"

"Outside the wall. I told him it's safe here for everyone now, but…"

Octavia doesn't hear the rest of the girl's sentence; she's already running, not caring what else is around her until…

"Oh. My. God," she breathes. He's been hurt, that much is obvious, though she's not quite sure what out there would leave gashes like that on a human being. Certainly not from the morning's battle, no one she knows fights that well or that dirty with a sharp object so there's got to be another explanation. "Are you okay?"

"Octavia." His voice is soft,like he never thought her name would cross his lips again. "You're…"

"Shut up about me, what the hell happened to _you_?" she snaps.

"Doesn't matter."

"Those aren't…"

"Your friend already patched me up as she could. She's good."

"I'm learning from her," Octavia shrugs. "The amount of us, we need another medic, and…"

Before she can say anything else, his lips are on hers and her mind blanks for a moment. She's kissed a few people in the last month or so - making up for lost time, she figures - but there is something different about the way Lincoln is with her, a gentleness that makes her wonder if maybe there is room for love in this messed-up world.

"Missed you too," she shrugs when they come up for air. "Anyone going to notice if you go missing for a while?"

"Don't think so."

"Good. Because you owe me for convincing me you were dead."

"You thought…?"

"I don't know how your culture works, but this knife seems important, and you don't just give important things to people unless…"

"I wanted you to be safe. Wanted to make sure you could protect yourself."

"You're sweet," she laughs, leaning up and kissing him. "C'mon. Just because there's a truce doesn't mean people are suddenly going to be okay with us sleeping together."

"We don't have to…"

"I know. I know I don't _have_ to do anything. You've made that pretty clear. But right now, I need to just… not think about things, okay? I need you to distract me."

He smiles, taking her hand, and she decides then and there that she is definitely in love. It's quite an alliance, really - could be mutually beneficial, assuming anyone on his side is still speaking to him - but it's more than that. Because he looks at her the way they say lovers look at each other in stories, like there is nothing more glorious in the world, and it makes little butterflies flutter somewhere between her stomach and her womb. She wants this, wants whatever it entails, wants to find some way to make all of the different parts of her life mesh and wants to make it mean something. But right now, she'll settle for the man whose arm is around her shoulders.

She watches him, notices that something is wrong, and decides to act before things get out of hand. "Who got you this time?"

"Don't know, but they're a good shot."

"Another arrow?" she asks, rolling her eyes.

"Third time in a bit over a week. Pretty sure that's a record."

"Okay, as much as I want things… you look like hell, and that wins."

"I'll be okay, Octavia."

"Stop risking yourself for me! I'm not weak, I'm not.."

"I never said you were. No, you are so, so strong. But I still want to keep you safe."

"So… how do your people even do relationships? Because if the fact that we had sex means we're married or something, I am not gonna be happy."

"No. Nothing like that."

"Good. I don't know what I'm doing… I was hidden most of my life, and…"

"It's alright," he whispers, kissing her forehead. "I love you."

There's something so offhand about the way he says those words, like it's the most obvious and instinctive and genuine thing in the world, that she can't help but say them back. "I love you too." Or, at least, she's trying to. "We need to set some rules, though. Like… you need to stop dramatically saving my life, because I'm not sure I can deal with this amount of panic on a regular basis."

He nods. "I can try."

"Good," she whispers against his skin, kissing him proper again. She could spend a lifetime doing that, she thinks, taking what she can and clinging to it. "Because I want this, more than anything. I want _you_."

\--------

She is in his arms the morning after, nestled under improvised blankets in her tent when noises wake her. "I'm gonna go see what's going on," she whispers, slipping out and dressing quickly. "I'll be back, promise."

She's not sure what she expects - her mind is still hazy, and the twinge of guilt that she ought to be doing something practical is beginning to be a problem - but the crowd of people in the center of camp, an eclectic mix of survivors and Grounders, is not it. "What the hell is going on?" she asks, pushing forward. "Is something wrong?"

"There you are." Clarke's face is worn, obviously the girl hasn't slept in days, but her pretty blue eyes light up at the sight of her friend. "We need everyone we can get, Octavia. Even your… boyfriend."

"That's not an explanation."

"The Ark landed a couple of hours' walk from here. We're not sure what we're going to find, but… as many people as we can spare are going out. I have to stay here and deal with yesterday's wounded, but you're almost as good as I am and…"

"I'm not _that_ good," Octavia growls. "But okay. Gimme five minutes and we're in."

Back to the tent now, fingernails digging into her lover's shoulders to wake him. "Hey. We have stuff to do."

"Is everything alright?" Lincoln asks, blinking.

"For us, yeah. For the unknown amount of people who just came down from the sky… we don't know. I'm being sent on the trip as a medic, and you need to come because… you need to, okay?"

He leans up, gently kissing her. "How much of a trip is it?"

"They're thinking a few hours' walk, so… I don't know. Day or two?"

"You sure you can do that?"

"Stop worrying so much about me. I'm not the one with multiple wounds that haven't quite healed…"

"But you're also not used to this environment yet."

"I'll be fine. I've got you in case something happens to me, yeah?"

\--------

It's a few days before everything quiets down. There are few major injuries from the Ark's landing, but enough minor ones to keep Octavia occupied for hours on end, and once those are dealt with there are countless questions to answer. There's a month of Earth-knowledge she has that the new arrivals lack, and while most of them have the sense to pester other people, she develops a following primarily composed of ten-year-old girls who need something to cling to. She never would've described herself as maternal - until a month ago, the idea of ever being in that role was impossible for her to even consider - but she does what she can for the kids and realizes she's not all that bad with 'em. Maybe, she thinks, maybe someday she'll have children of her own and they'll turn out okay.

Then there's the grand Council meeting the fourth day after the landing, which Octavia is obligated to speak at because she has a perspective no one else does. She's seen enough to know that the Council members are going to try to play nice with the Grounder leaders, but apparently her experiences need to be discussed as well, and once everyone else who's helped guide the delinquents has spoken, it's her turn.

"We were wrong when we tried to fight them. Maybe I'm biased because one of them saved my life a few times and I fell in love with him, but… we were wrong. If we're going to survive, we need to coexist and learn from each other. We need to give outside perspectives a chance, or else all of us - Ark, delinquent, Grounder alike - are doomed."

She has never felt so brave, nor so small. There are questions - she makes it clear that the situation she is in, the man she lies beside at night, is her conscious choice - but then she is dismissed and she walks out of the dropship with a confidence she has never felt before. And it is valid, she decides as the young girls cluster around her and her lover watches from a distance. She is valid. In this new world, she exists and she is significant and for the first time in her life, Octavia Blake is genuinely happy.

\--------

Some things are inevitable in this wild world, she realizes. With space and resources in unseen abundance, people tend to do things, like… have children. When she feels something unfamiliar in her abdomen a couple of months into the rebuilding, as everyone's starting to call it, all she can do is break down in tears because this was not supposed to _happen_ to her. She was supposed to be dead by now - her eighteenth birthday had to have been a couple of weeks ago, her sense of time isn't the best but she's sure it's passed - but instead she is alive, so alive and so scared of what may happen.

"Are you alright?" someone asks. It's one of the older Ark women, the only doctor they had left, Clarke's mother. Octavia's spent most of the last few months training under her, and it's surprisingly fascinating. This, too, is not a chance she ever expected to have - but there's something glorious about putting people back together, being strong when others can't be, and she's more than alright with being given that task.

"No," she whispers. "I don't think so."

"Bad day, or…?"

"I'm pretty sure I'm pregnant." Five words, five little words, and she feels her world come crashing down around her because this is not supposed to _happen_ to her and verbalizing her fear only makes it worse.

The doctor looks at her with a surprising amount of sympathy. "Do you want to be, Octavia?"

"Yeah, I think so, but… I'm scared. I'm so so scared."

"I felt the same way you did when I found out I was going to have Clarke. And like you, I had a partner who loved me and a supportive community around me."

"People still talk about me, what I've done, and…"

"And once that child is born, when it comes out perfectly healthy and normal-looking, they'll _stop_ talking."

"Do you think it _will_ be okay?"

"I can't say for sure, but you're young and healthy and your partner is the same so I'd say your odds are good."

"Can… can I go and…"

"Do what you need to do. I don't think we're going to have any disasters here this afternoon, and I know where to find you if something bad happens."

So Octavia runs, not stopping until she reaches the far end of the wall. She's still surprised they decided to keep it up, but she supposes there's some logic to an enclosed space for the more vulnerable people to live in. Her eyes dart for her partner - he said he was going this way today to help cut down a few trees - but there's no sign of him, maybe she misheard something, maybe…

"Thought you were in the clinic today," a familiar voice says. She whirls around and takes him in - covered in dirt, obviously tired, but still happy to see her. "Did something happen?"

"Yeah. Something happened." She takes a deep breath and forces herself to maintain eye contact. "I'm pregnant."

His arms wrap around her and he twirls her around, clearly pleased with the news. "You'll be a good mother."

"You have too much faith in me sometimes, Lincoln."

"Not possible."

"What do people even _do_ with kids here? There are so many things I don't know, I'm so scared, and…"

"You're brave, Octavia. You're brave and our son will be too."

"What makes you think it'll be a boy?"

"Instinct. Although if we have a daughter instead… that doesn't change anything. I will love you and our child no matter what happens."

"I know." If this had to happen, she thinks, it definitely could've happened with worse.

\--------

The howling child in her arms is worth the pain, she decides as she looks down at him. She is a woman grown now in the eyes of everyone she knows, nearly nineteen, wife of one of the leaders of their society and sister of another. But she exists as her own person as well - she is strong, she is brave, she has had control over her own life for just over a year now and she's still learning who she is but she's getting there. She can do this.

"Hey," she whispers, looking down at her son. "You're here and you're beautiful like your dad and you're gonna be brave like him too, and between him and I and everyone else we know, you're gonna be safe."

"The fact that you have maternal instincts amazes me," a voice says behind her.

"Shut up, Bell," she mutters, turning to glare at her older brother. "You're just jealous that I have my life together while _you_ won't admit you're in love with Clarke."

"I'm not in love with her."

"Are so. And she'd give you a chance, it's been over a month since she last threatened to physically hurt you, that's a start…"

"Enough about me, O. Can I hold him?"

"Y'know, usually the father of the kid is the first person who gets that honor… but okay, fine, but just for a few moments," she mutters, handing over the child. "His name's Aidan."

The door opens again, and next thing Octavia knows, her husband's arms are wrapped tight around her and she's almost thankful she handed the kid off when she did. "You're alright," Lincoln whispers, kissing her forehead. "You're alright."

"You need to stop being so surprised," she laughs, though she understands his worry. Childbirth without a lot of medical conveniences is a messy process, and she's well aware she could've died. "I'm fine. Tired and sore, but fine."

"Then rest. I'll stay up with our son."

"He's gonna need me sooner or later, I shouldn't…"

"You need to be lucid for him later, Octavia. It's alright."

"I love you," she breathes as she lets her eyes close. "I love you, I love you, I love you."

 


End file.
